The skills I have learned from the Heart Coach institute are absolutely life-changing. I have learned a new way to communicate and it has
Minda Christensen, HCI Heart-Centered Life Coach • May 6, 2022 • 4 Minute Read
Coaching Success Stories: Minda
The skills I have learned from the Heart Coach institute are absolutely life-changing. I have learned a new way to communicate and it has improved all of the relationships in my life, given hope, as well as allowed me to help others improve their lives. I think my biggest achievement in graduating from the Heart Coach Institute is that in learning how to coach others, I was able to use all of the skills we learned to also help myself. In the 24 weeks of training, I not only changed the way I communicated with others, but I changed the way I communicated with myself as well as being able to take accountability for my role in all of my relationships.
One area where there has been a drastic improvement is with my family. In changing how I communicate with them we have become much closer and the fighting has decreased dramatically. As a parent, I thought that giving my kids advice is what I was supposed to do. When they were little that was fine, but now that they are teenagers and young adults advice was the last thing they wanted. In changing the perspective of not giving advice, and solely listening I have learned so many things about my kids and how they like to problem solve. It has also empowered them to make their own decisions and has increased their confidence.
With my spouse, our conversations usually resulted in one of us becoming defensive and we avoided any conversation that had anything to do with our feelings. In just changing the way that I approached him and realizing through learning to coach others that part of the journey is to be accountable for your own barriers and to work past them, our conversations are actually conversations and are not ending up in arguments. Which is amazing. We have a lot more conversations about important things and have stopped avoiding each other.
HOPE FOR RELATIONSHIPS
When I started this program I had decided to divorce my husband of 20 years, and from the comments he was making, I know he was thinking about divorce also. During the 24 weeks of this training, using my learned skills on myself and in communicating with him, we have had a definite shift in our relationship. For the first time in years, I have hope that our relationship can be mended, it is already so much better than it was. I have been able to hope and work towards a better relationship than we have ever had. I have no doubts at this point that we will be successful because we are both working on healing ourselves.
I have worked with several clients who are also struggling with relationships. In working with them to connect to their hearts, and start to love themselves again, we can find out what barriers they are putting up in their relationships and then tear them down. When they are confident enough to be vulnerable in their relationships, take accountability, and then look at situations with more compassion, my client’s relationships have also improved. And that is everything.
Another area these skills have helped me is at work. As a nurse, we are used to advising about everything. Everything and anything to help answer questions and help our patients to live healthier lives. The amazing thing is that when I stopped giving advice and stopped listening with the intent of telling them options, I realized something very important. I am not near as good of a listener as I thought I was. They don’t need advice, most of them already know, and in listening and asking more questions it gives a much clearer picture of what they need. I get twice as much information as before and can assess where their actual needs are, without assuming that I know. It has also made it so much easier to build a rapport with them, and it is much quicker.
THE HEART CONNECTION
I find myself using the skills everywhere I go. At home, at work, with my friends, at Walmart… everywhere. I also love working with clients. I am very passionate about helping my clients to connect to their hearts. I love to see them learning to love themselves again while tuning out that negative commentary that we all struggle with. I love helping my client to figure out what their barriers are and setting goals to get past them. I love seeing them get their spark back and witnessing the twinkle in their eye while they excitedly dream about what the future could look like while setting goals to make that future happen for themselves. I absolutely love celebrating all of their successes with them.
In fact, that sparkle is what inspired the name of my business. Soul Shimmer Wellness is all about finding self-love, we glow differently when we love ourselves and are confident without any need for validation from others. That glow is the shimmery light that our soul gives off, it can’t help but shine through our eyes and make them sparkle, and shine through the love in our hearts as we give it away. My passion and purpose in this life are to help you find that love so that you can love yourself unconditionally.
Learning To Love Myself
The reason I am so completely passionate about all of this is because I lived for over 40 years without it. I shoved my emotions down until I was completely disconnected from my heart, emotionally numb, and merely existing. Now that I know how much better life is fully connected to my heart, and loving myself–all of me–unconditionally, the love and the joy that I feel have inspired me to help others. The second I caught a glimpse of that light, that hope for better days, I could not wait to share it. Learning to love myself opened up the possibility for my friends and loved ones who were also struggling to have hope. There is always hope!
Minda Christensen, Certified Life Coach